OCD

Living with a monster

“Its on an odd!” I screamed from the backseat of the car. Leaning forward at a stark angle, I impatiently slapped the soft cushion of my dad’s driver-side seat. 

Silently and without much thought, he calmly turned the radio dial up one notch so that the number on the sleek, black surface would read fourteen rather than thirteen. Feeling the wave of equilibrium rush over me, I settled back into my seat and enjoyed the Shania Twain lyrics that were flooding back into my focus.

This was my normal. And it had become my family’s normal too. Odd numbers, uneven lines, cracks on sidewalks–these were no-gos. Counting in fours, even numbers, the sign of the cross, and spelling out each word said on my favorite television shows–these were musts. 

It was early on in life that others recognized these odd games and patterns. Family members often joked that my brother and I–him with his ticks, and I with my games–were OCD; however, none of them knew how true their tongue-in-cheek comments actually were. That is, until things started to become much worse. 

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Podcast

Dr Steven Phillipson – Choice (Audiobook)

In episode 187 of The OCD Stories podcast I share Dr Steven Phillipson audio of his article on “Choice”. Steven is a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy for OCD. He co-founded the first Support group for OCD sufferers in the New York area in 1987. Steven is the Clinical Director at the Center for Cognitive Behavioral Psychotherapy.

Dr Steven Phillipson

In this episode I share Dr Steven Phillipson’s audio from his article on “Choice”. Steven kindly allowed me to share his article in audio form with you all. He writes “In both the treatment of OCD and in living a disciplined life, there is no word more important than “choice.” Hope it helps.

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To listen on iTunes click the button, or go to iTunes and search “The OCD Stories“. If you enjoy the podcast please subscribe and leave a review. It helps us reach more people who need to hear these remarkable stories of recovery!

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Podcast

Shmuel Fischler – Religious OCD, and Scrupulosity

In episode 186 of The OCD Stories podcast I interviewed Shmuel Fischler. Shmuel is the owner and lead clinician at CBT Baltimore.

Shmuel Fischler

In this episode I chat with Shmuel about his therapy story, what is religious themed OCD, what is scrupulously, common compulsions and obsessions with this theme, distinguishing between religious rituals and OCD rituals (compulsions), working with religious figures to support therapy, example exposures for religious OCD, the effectiveness of ERP, family involvement, words of hope, and much much more. Hope it helps.

podcast

To listen on iTunes click the button, or go to iTunes and search “The OCD Stories“. If you enjoy the podcast please subscribe and leave a review. It helps us reach more people who need to hear these remarkable stories of recovery!

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Podcast

Lily Bailey – Live from Austin

In episode 185 of The OCD Stories podcast I interviewed Lily Bailey, in front of an audience at the IOCDF conference in Austin. Lily is a model, OCD advocate and author of the book “Because we are bad: OCD and a girl lost in thought”.  

Stuart and Lily on stage

In this episode I chat with Lily about her story, having a meaningful life, working with anger, getting treatment, going to OCD support groups, Lily’s first experience with her CBT therapist, going back to CBT, mindfulness and meditation, activities Lily does that help her, Lily talks about her book, what it was like sharing her story, her epiphany in recovery, imposter syndrome, and lots of audience questions. Hope it helps.

podcast

To listen on iTunes click the button, or go to iTunes and search “The OCD Stories“. If you enjoy the podcast please subscribe and leave a review. It helps us reach more people who need to hear these remarkable stories of recovery!

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OCD

My OCD Journey

My journey with OCD started long before a proper diagnosis. Since my early teenage years I’ve cycled through almost all of the subtypes of OCD, the most prominent being somatic OCD. In my mind so far I’ve had Cancer, Meningitis, Rabies, HIV, Stomach ulcers etc. Currently my Illness based OCD thoughts center around development of Schizophrenia. I have been worrying about this for months and months. It seems that this is a somewhat common theme to have, but I rarely ever hear it talked about. I’ve read pretty much every symptom and examples of symptoms including paranoia, hallucinations and delusional thinking to the point where I cannot go a day without thinking about it. 

I’ll rewind to about two years 4 years ago when I started worrying that I had hit a pedestrian while driving so I would have to loop around multiple times turning a 5 minute commute into a 30 minute one. If my wife or friends were in the car, I’d just ask for reassurance and keep moving on. I had not yet been diagnosed with OCD at this point I just thought I was be extra cautious. This is when the story gets progressively worse.

About 9 month ago I was gearing up for my honeymoon to Switzerland with my wife, but had massive deadlines to meet at work which was causing me a great deal of stress. I was sitting at my desk when suddenly my surroundings seemed a little weird and I started to get an impending doom feeling. My chest got tight and started breathing heavily. Next was the tunnel vision. Was I dying? Nope but I was having a massive panic attack. I asked my co-worker to walk me downstairs because I was freaking out. The panic attack eventually passed and things were back to normal. Somehow with all the hustle and bustle of traveling to Switzerland and Italy for 3 weeks, I managed to enjoy my time there and take in the beautiful sights. Things seemed pretty alright. 

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Podcast

Dr Amy Mariaskin – Gender Identity themed OCD

In episode 184 of The OCD Stories podcast I interviewed Dr Amy Mariaskin. Amy is a licenced clinical psychologist and director at The Nashville OCD & Anxiety Treatment Center. 

Dr Amy Mariaskin

In this episode I chat with Amy about her OCD and therapy story, the story behind her clinic’s logo, Amy explains the terminology around gender identity, what are some obsessions and compulsions around this gender identity theme (sometimes called transgender OCD), what some example exposures look like for this theme, the effectiveness of ERP for this theme, words of hope, self-compassion, and much much more. Hope it helps.

podcast

To listen on iTunes click the button, or go to iTunes and search “The OCD Stories“. If you enjoy the podcast please subscribe and leave a review. It helps us reach more people who need to hear these remarkable stories of recovery!

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Podcast

Dr Steven Phillipson – Magical thinking in OCD

In episode 183 of The OCD Stories podcast I interviewed Dr Steven Phillipson. Steven is a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy for OCD. He co-founded the first Support group for OCD sufferers in the New York area in 1987. Steven is the Clinical Director at the Center for Cognitive Behavioral Psychotherapy.

Dr Steven Phillipson

In this episode I chat with Steven about what is OCD, what is magical thinking, how magical thinking exists in society, ERP for magical thinking, thought-action fusion, words of hope, and much much more. Hope it helps. 

podcast

To listen on iTunes click the button, or go to iTunes and search “The OCD Stories“. If you enjoy the podcast please subscribe and leave a review. It helps us reach more people who need to hear these remarkable stories of recovery!

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Podcast

Dr Steven Phillipson – Two Tail Spikes in OCD

In episode 182 of The OCD Stories podcast I interviewed Dr Steven Phillipson. Steven is a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy for OCD. He co-founded the first Support group for OCD sufferers in the New York area in 1987. Steven is the Clinical Director at the Center for Cognitive Behavioral Psychotherapy.

Dr Steven Phillipson

In this episode I chat with Steven about what are two tail spikes?, examples of two tail spikes, a solution to it, making choices, learning to not find the answer, how perfection can affect this, acceptance of the uncertainty, and much much more. Hope it helps.

podcast

To listen on iTunes click the button, or go to iTunes and search “The OCD Stories“. If you enjoy the podcast please subscribe and leave a review. It helps us reach more people who need to hear these remarkable stories of recovery!

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Podcast

Kimberley Quinlan – Let’s talk about self-love

In episode 181 of The OCD Stories podcast I interviewed Kimberley Quinlan. Kimberley is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who treats people with OCD and related disorders, Eating Disorders and Body Focused Repetitive Disorders. She runs her own podcast called Your Anxiety Toolkit, and is a former guest of the show.

Kimberley Quinlan

In this episode I chat with Kimberley about what is self-love (self-acceptance), why is it important in recovery, what comes before self-love, steps/stages before self-love, self-love when you have taboo or shameful thoughts, learning to receive, self-compassion, practicing self-love when you feel like a bad person, reducing the stigma around self-love 
and much much more. Hope it helps.

podcast

To listen on iTunes click the button, or go to iTunes and search “The OCD Stories“. If you enjoy the podcast please subscribe and leave a review. It helps us reach more people who need to hear these remarkable stories of recovery!

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Podcast

Dr Charles Mansueto – OCD Treatment

In episode 180 of The OCD Stories podcast I interviewed Dr Charles Mansueto. Charles is the founder and director of the Behavior Therapy Center of Greater Washington. He currently serves on the Scientific and Clinical Advisory Board for the IOCDF.

In this episode I chat with Charles about his therapy story, the history of OCD treatment, consulting on the TV show PURE, explaining ERP, sticking points some people face when doing exposures, OCD and Tourettes, uncertainty, Charles shares client examples, and much much more. Hope it helps.

podcast

To listen on iTunes click the button, or go to iTunes and search “The OCD Stories“. If you enjoy the podcast please subscribe and leave a review. It helps us reach more people who need to hear these remarkable stories of recovery!

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